After you have had a few dates with someone and you think there is a possibility that this relationship might be worth developing further, you can start to ask more serious questions about their childhood, family, job etc.

Eventually the relationship might progress to where the really tough questions can and must be asked. Like “have you ever slept with someone without using a condom” or “how much debt do you have”? Unfortunately there is no easy way to bring up these questions. Or is there…

Recently, I received a copy of Michael Webb’s newest book, 1000 Questions for Couples: What you absolutely must know about the person you are with. This book is going to make those difficult questions much easier to ask.

The questions begin off easy like “Has anyone dear to you died? How did you handle it” and “About what things are you most selfish.” They slowly progress (just like your relationship should) until you get to those questions that you simply can’t avoid if you are looking to commit your life to.

There are questions on drug addictions, abuse, child rearing, finances and lots of questions about sex. The biggest benefit I found was that because these questions were coming from a book, it didn’t feel like “I” was asking them.

A special bonus that I really liked was the option to get 3-5 of the book’s questions emailed to me each day. That way I could forward the questions on to my beloved and we could each read over them and forward the answers to each other that night. I can see where this would be very valuable for those in long distance relationships. It sure worked for me.

While there are a lot of questions in this book that are crucial for couples in the dating stage, there are also many questions that are useful for people who are already married. If you value your relationship, I urge you to ask these 1000 Questions for Couples.

There is a common misconception that the hardest part of a relationship is finding your soul mate. Not true! The hard work starts once you have found and committed to that person. Once the ‘honeymoon’ period is over in a relationship it requires you to make a choice to continue to build into the relationship and keep the magic alive.

If your relationship is based on a strong friendship and you have common interests you have something that you can work with straight away. Keeping the magic alive in a relationship needs to be intentional. Take time to think about and plan activities that you can do together to reconnect.

Below is a list of activities that you can do daily, weekly, monthly and once a year to keep the magic alive in your relationship.

Take time each day to show your affection for each other. Take time to touch and tell your partner that you love them. Find something about your day that makes you both laugh.

Once a week do something active that lifts your spirits, go for a walk together and spend time discussing your week. Organise a regular date night with your partner. Boost your partner’s self esteem by encouraging them. Write them a note or a card expressing your love and appreciation for them.

Monthly, take time to clear the air of damaging emotions and start fresh in your relationship. Intentionally focus on intimacy. In long term relationships where intimacy is not the priority of both partners in the relationship it can become stale and cause problems if you do not take time to intentionally focus on it.

Once a year in your relationship review your top ten highlights together and in your individual lives. This will reconnect you with your partner on your journey through life. Share your victories and your struggles. Take time to chart the course for the coming year. Set goals together and plan your future.

When you choose to intentionally spend time on your relationship you will reap the rewards. Anything worth doing in life is worth working for and having happy relationships is the key to happiness in life.  

When you go out on a date, it is important that you use that date as an opportunity to observe and see if the person is someone you would like to see again and if they carry the qualities you are looking for. You can do this through asking questions and talking about your life. It is important that relationships are open and honest in the early stages so that both parties can see the other person for who they really are.

Dating is a risky business as there is always the potential that you could be hurt when you allow yourself to be vulnerable and open up to another person. I believe however, that the benefit of being open, honest and vulnerable far outweighs the risks in the long term. This report contains some tips to get you started on your dating journey and some questions that you can ask along the way.

Tip #1- RELAX and lighten up! Finding the love of your life and settling down into marriage is serious business but you’re not there yet. Take a deep breath and enjoy the discover process- once it’s over you can’t go back!

Tip #2- HAVE FUN. For those of you who are outgoing and social this won’t be a problem. For those of you who are more like me, a bit reserved, sceptical, and have the tendency to take things a bit too seriously remember to have fun. If you do, the other

person will too! There is plenty of time for serious on the next date.

Tip #3- DATE IN GROUPS! This takes all the pressure off a ‘first date’ when you hardly know them. Organise a group of friends to go out and invite your date along with the group. Dating in groups is safe and fun. It provides you with opportunity to get to know the other person better in a group setting where there is not so much pressure. It’s less like a ‘date’ and more like a group of friends hanging out!

Tip #4- ASK QUESTIONS. Start with the light hearted questions like favourite food, music, people etc and then if you still like what you hear and see after the first date venture into the deeper questions later. Listen carefully to the answers of the questions and ask more questions about their interests later.

Here are some ideas for questions to get you started:

Light discussion:

• Favourite food, band, style of music, book.
• Where did you go to school?
• Hobbies
• Favourite people in the world- why?

Deeper questions- good things to know:

• What was your life like growing up?
• What were your relationships like with your
  parents, brothers or sisters?
• What memories do you have of holidays, parties,
  birthdays, family fun?
• Where did you go to school?
• As a kid, were you happy, sad, shy, outgoing,
  good in school?
• What did you do for fun as a kid?
• Were you rich or poor?
• How did you measure that?
• Have you had any serious illnesses in your
  family?
• Who was your first love?
• How did you meet?
• Who influenced you the most in your life?
• Have you had any major turning points in your
  life?
• Have you had to make any major life changing
  decisions?
• Do you have any regrets?
• What are your strengths and weaknesses?

As you establish a deeper relationship talk with one another about your families it will help you better understand the other person.

Questions relating to Family of Origin:

• How alike are your families?
• How different?
• What are your family traditions?
• How does your family communicate with one
  another?

When you are searching for your life partner or soul mate it is important to find someone you connect with. You have more of a chance of doing this when you ask the right questions. If you would like to know more questions that you absoulutely must ask click this link 1000 Questions For Couples for a review.